Are You Ok?: Pace Of Grace

Are You Ok?: Pace Your Race

Recap: Rest & Restore

We’ve been working through some key principles that I believe will help you grow in the area of mental health. First we looked as the importance of rest. We operate best when we work from rest, not to rest.

Then we looked at the importance of restoration. The reality is that there’s brokenness all around us. But more important than what’s around us, is what’s going on inside of us.

Personal Story: From the last few weeks and then today

The past few weeks grief has hit me. Many of you know I lost my dad almost a month ago. I wasn’t prepared for it nor did I want it. But, for me it’s a season that I can honestly say that I am not Ok. Aren’t we glad this is a safe space to say that? But, I can say that I am not Ok in a healthy way. The reason I feel that is because over the years the Lord has taken me on a journey of learning what it means to identify my season so I can pace my race. For me my capacity has decreased, my mental alertness is different, and I’m more short strung…. so I have had to adjust things so I can pace my race.

I am now learning to hold grief in one hand and purpose in the other and position myself to allow the Lord to speak into me as to what moving forward looks like.

Maybe it’s not grief for you. Maybe it’s anxiety, or depression. Maybe it’s lack of desire, or relationship restoration, or PTSD. Wherever you are tonight we desire for you to know you are not alone. God has a plan for you. He wants to meet you where you are tonight & show you there is purpose in the pain. There is purpose in the struggle. There is purpose when we choose to be intentional with each and every season.

Passage: Ephesians 5:15-17 NLT

So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. 16 Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. 17 Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do.

Pray:

Title: Pace Your Race

Big Idea: You have to identify your season so that you can set your rhythm

“All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize.” - 1 Corinthians 9:25

It’s possible to be doing the right things, in the wrong season.

Main Points:

1. Analyze Your Life

   1. So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. (V15)
   2. The First Stop
      1. The hardest part in setting a healthy pace isn’t the first step, it’s the first stop.
      2. You can determine in your mind how you are going to respond either in the moment or in advance.
      3. If you want to set a healthy pace, you have to first stop and identify your season, then make a plan.
      4. “Decide what’s right ahead of time, and you’ll do what’s right at the time.” - Chris Hodges

   3. Illust: Running a marathon vs. running from danger

      1. Many of us live our lives reactive and not proactive.
      2. Setting aside time to stop requires great discipline and intentionality
      3. A wise sailer never aimlessly drifts in the ocean praying for wind. A wise sailor charts their course, sets their sails, and guides the rudder towards the desired direction.
      4. “We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” - Proverbs 16:9
      5. We have a responsibility in the journey to do out part, but then we also have to acknowledge that the Lord is the one directing our steps.
         4. “The patterns we cultivate shape the person we become” - Brad Lomenick

      6. Maximize Your Present

         1. Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. (V16)
         2. Make the most does not mean “Do the most” or “Do more than everyone else.”

      7. This is your journey. God has graced you for a pace this season.

      8. Some of you have been setting a pace on what others want or expect of you and not what’s best for you and your future. Your health and relationship to God far outweigh the approval of others.
         3. Quality over quantity
      9. Make the most is more about presence than present.
      10. Illust: Your kids spell love TIME. But how many of you know that you can spend time with your family and still be disconnected.
          4. Identify Your Season
      11. Ecc 3 To Everything there is a season.
          1. [There is an occasion for everything, and a time for every activity under heaven: a time to give birth and a time to die; a time to plant and a time to uproot; a time to kill and a time to heal; a time to tear down and a time to build; a time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance; a time to throw stones and a time to gather stones; a time to embrace and a time to avoid embracing; a time to search and a time to count as lost; a time to keep and a time to throw away; a time to tear and a time to sew; a time to be silent and a time to speak; a time to love and a time to hate; a time for war and a time for peace.](https://www.bible.com/bible/1713/ECC.3.1.CSB)
          2. Have you taken time to identify what season you are in?
      12. Questions to identify your season:
          1. Maybe you’re not OK and you don’t even know you’re not ok.
          2. How is your mental space right now? Have you been having restless or even sleepless nights?
          3. Have you experienced a loss lately, maybe it is to death, but maybe a loss of a friend, or even a spouse-maybe through a divorce or break up?
          4. How are your finances? How many of us know that finances can be a trigger for the mental and physical?
          5. Maybe you’re in the process of starting something new or building something. Did you know that it takes a swimming pool of gasoline to launch a jet engine in the air but only a tank of gas from a suburban to sustain it? We we have experienced this even starting Pinewood. We knew we were in a grinding season when we were building up for launch. But, it wasn’t going to be sustainable to stay there. So we defined it in the season stayed up til 2am grind all day and night and then when we launched we re set our rhythms around a new season that would be sustainable for the long haul.
          6. What about your work environment. Is it toxic or healthy. Are you giving it your all or half hearted? If half hearted, why?
          7. Lastly I know this relates to us, do you have kids? That’s a pretty long season but it’s a season.
      13. There is a season and a time for everything. We must first identify our seasons. It’s easy to escape and hibernate in hard seasons. Confusing seasons. And I do believe there is lots of grace in different seasons, but how do we handle these seasons? Is it healthy to walk away from everything and say oh it’s just the season I am in, or do we identify our seasons so we can still move forward and create new and healthy rhythms around our seasons.
      14. Here are a few helpful things to remember once you identify the season you are in.
          1. No Season Lasts Forever
          2. The season you are in does not define you.
          3. We must build consistency within the season we are in.

2. Set Your Rhythm

   1. 3 Variables (time, energy, and intimacy). One of these are finite, the other two depend on you.

   2. Time:

      1. You get 24 hours a day.
      2. Budget your time

      3. Application:

         1. Write down your week
         2. Plug your schedule in your calendar
         3. Make adjustments as necessary
         4. Stay disciplined to your calendar
            3. Energy:

      4. “Just because it’s doable, doesn’t mean it’s sustainable.” - Rich Wilkerson Jr.

      5. Take the test: -2 - +2. Gauge the things that either drain you or sustain you. That either bring you down or refresh you.

      6. Write down a plan, simplify your decisions, create a routine, get in the habit of saying “no”.

         4. Intimacy:

      7. When you are setting your rhythms and identifying different elements of your rhythms, people are a big part of that.

      8. Question: Who or what is getting your best? Whois getting your leftovers?

      9. People matter, relationships matter, but there is only 1 you. When you are re setting rhythms how does that change your relationships?

         1. Practical:

            1. When do you spend time with God. He should never be one to go off of your list of priorities. Stay faithful and consistent in your time with him.
            2. Know your inner circle of people. Maybe that is a spouse, kids, extended family, best friends, your crew. They get your first. They get your best.
            3. The enemy wants to deceive, wreck, and ruin your life. He wants you to be anxious, fearful, and depressed. God wants you to have a full and abundant life.

   3. “The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.” - John 10:10

   4. We need to “make the most” of our opportunities because otherwise we are quick to lose our way!

3. Prioritize Your Values

   1. Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do. (V17)

   2. Question: What are your motives behind your rhythm? Is it increase? Is it status? Is it self gratification? Is it the “I told you so” mentality?

      1. Your why behind the how will reveal your what.
      2. “All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize.” - 1 Corinthians 9:25
      3. Question: Are your motives temporary and selfish in nature or are they eternal and selfless?
         3. How to develop convictions (values)? By Jerry Bridges

      4. Is it helpful spiritually, physically, and mentally?

         1. “You say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is good for you. And even though “I am allowed to do anything,” I must not become a slave to anything.” - 1 Corinthians 6:12 NLT 2. Does it bring me under its power?

         2. “When he died, he died once to break the power of sin. But now that he lives, he lives for the glory of God. 11 So you also should consider yourselves to be dead to the power of sin and alive to God through Christ Jesus.” - Romans 6:10-11 3. Does it hurt others?

         3. “And when you sin against other believers by encouraging them to do something they believe is wrong, you are sinning against Christ.” - 1 Corinthians 8:12 4. Does it glorify God?

         4. “So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” 1 Corinthians 10:31 NLT

Closing: You have to identify your season so that you can set your rhythm